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1mks
1mks  (Level: 211.0 - Posts: 5883)
Tue, 14th Oct '08 8:08 AM

NEW STOCK MARKET TERMS



CEO -- Chief Embezzlement Officer.

CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.

BULL MARKET -- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.

BEAR MARKET -- A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.

VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.

P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.

BROKER -- What my broker has made me.

STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.

STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

STOCK SPLIT -- When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.

FINANCIAL PLANNER -- A guy whose phone has been disconnected.

MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.

CASH FLOW-- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.

YAHOO -- What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.

WINDOWS -- What you jump out of when you're the sucker who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.

INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nut house.

PROFIT -- An archaic word no longer in use

NINJA Loan – No Income, No Job or Assets……..No Problem!!!!


pennwoman
Pennwoman  (Level: 155.2 - Posts: 2478)
Tue, 14th Oct '08 8:55 AM

LOL, Marsha, good one!

sandracam
Sandracam  (Level: 149.3 - Posts: 4190)
Tue, 14th Oct '08 2:02 PM

Very funny! And true, unfortunately.

alvandy
Alvandy  (Level: 229.6 - Posts: 7570)
Tue, 14th Oct '08 5:48 PM

Very funny stuff!
Can't wait for the "bull market" to come to my house.




alvandy
Alvandy  (Level: 229.6 - Posts: 7570)
Tue, 14th Oct '08 5:50 PM

P.S.- currently a "bear market" is apparent





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