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Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 10:16 AM


I am now 35 for the 21st time. And I have now arrived at 'the year" for me.

My very beloved 1st mother-in-law, who taught me what a mother's love can really be, died in 1976. She died around 6:00am ,exactly 75 days after her 56th birthday.

If I live 75 days from yesterday, I plan to be at her gravesite at 6am that morning, in full realization that if I were she, that would be a day I wouldn't have awakened. And every day from that day will be even more precious to me to breathe...and to get to spend with my family - especially my grandson.

Her name was Bessie. She was the most loving, kind, amazing example of a Christian woman I've ever met in my life.

She loved children and wanted many. That didn't happen for her, though, because medical advances we take for granted today didn't exist yet.

She was pregnant 7 times with 9 children (two sets of twins). Only 3 of those babies lived full term. Two boys lived and still live. Her baby daughter was a full-term birth, but lived only 3 hours.

Bessie had her first heart attack at 39. The doctor said it was from the stress of trying to have children.

She had her last heart attack at 56 years and 75 days.

She LOVED my son, who was not quite 3 years old on that fateful day.

Every day I have past 56 years and 75 days i will look at my previous grandson and hug him even more because those are days I have with him that Bessie didn't get to have with my son.

And of course, I've hugged my son closer throughout all his years, trying to hug and love him for 2.

Do you have "a year" or "a day" that in your life, you've marked as a very special one?

Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 10:17 AM

(sorry - "previous" should read "precious")

Goddess28  (Level: 92.6 - Posts: 5236)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 10:19 AM

The day my son was born, after the terrible loss of my daughter. It was a miracle and I will never forget the moment they rolled him into my room in the dark with the light from the door glisting on his beautiful red hair. (sniff)

Smoke  (Level: 96.7 - Posts: 12009)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 10:33 AM

Beautiful tribute, Jan.

Don't feel bad about the typo, I usually produce "precious" instead of "previous," which can go SO wrong. They just had to put the V right next to the C to mess us up.

I remember that day too, Sheri, and two glistening red heads.

Tuzilla  (Level: 131.2 - Posts: 3769)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 10:51 AM

I have several, and hope for several more.

Papajensai  (Level: 190.4 - Posts: 1025)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 11:15 AM

Thanks for writing, all of you.

When my own kids were born, I was too gobsmacked to appreciate what was happening to me. Also, in those days, the father was banished to the waiting room, in my case to eye the cigarette butt in the ashtray and wonder if I should take a chance and light it up. As my grandchildren started arriving, I have been privileged to be in the room or very close by, experiencing the absolute wonder and awe and, more importantly, knowing that I was experiencing it. I barely remember my kids' birth days. Those later births are so indelibly etched in my brain that I'm still amazed. Those are my special times.

Leaston  (Level: 42.6 - Posts: 839)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 11:27 AM

I have many! Some happy and some sad...but they all, will stay in my heart!

Lodi  (Level: 96.1 - Posts: 2144)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 11:46 AM

As some of you read, I was away this weekend, coaching a softball tournament. That tournament happened to be in my hometown. Orofino is a baseball town - the stands are packed for all ball games, whether they are little league, girls' softball, or the high school teams. My dad was a little league coach for many years for my brother's team. He pushed too hard, my brother rebelled, and never played ball again. My dad was heartbroken but when I came along and showed promise, his eyes lit up and he had another ball player in the family.

My dad died before my youngest daughter was born. This weekend we played on the very fields where I played little league through high school ball. As I watched her stand in the same spot on the field where I had stood years before, I thought of my dad and how much he would have loved to have been there. He did get to see my oldest daughter play little league but he died before seeing her play high school ball and eventually college ball.

And I did take a moment, when no one was looking, to walk out to the pitcher's mound, look up on the little hill where my dad used to park & watch the games, and give a little nod. Just in case.

Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 12:49 PM

That is such a awesome moment to share, Lodi.

Leaston  (Level: 42.6 - Posts: 839)
Mon, 15th Jun '09 1:02 PM

Wow! Lodi! It gave me goosebumps! Thanks for sharing that moment in your life!

Fudypatootie  (Level: 194.5 - Posts: 1302)
Tue, 16th Jun '09 1:06 AM

"I wasn't there that morning
When my father passed away.
I didn't get to tell him.
All the things I had to say.
I thought I felt his spirit
Later that same year.
I thought I heard his echo
In my newborn baby's tears.
I just wish I could have told him
In the living years."

Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Tue, 16th Jun '09 10:35 AM

Just wanted to bump this up in case anyone is reading today who wasn't around yesterday. I've loved reading what you've written above.

Lodi  (Level: 96.1 - Posts: 2144)
Tue, 16th Jun '09 11:35 AM

Funny you should mention that song. A few years ago, I transferred all of my family's old home movies to video and since they were silent, I made a soundtrack for them. That was my very first song on the video.

Barnierubble  (Level: 93.9 - Posts: 637)
Tue, 16th Jun '09 3:59 PM

My father, who I never really got to know well due to circumstances beyond our control, died at the age of 69.. He built Spitfires in the war, I was evacuated to the country. He then became a mechant seaman, spending months away from home, and I joined the RAF and left home at sixteen. I met him in Singapore in 1963, and saw him occaisionly after that. When he left the sea, my three brothers saw much more of him than I did as they lived in Southampton, whilst I lived all over England, as my job took me. He was 69 years, 4 months and 19 days old when he died in 1982, and I am just coming up to that age now. Both my older brothers are now well past that age, so hopefully, I will pass it too. My day is July 18th, so wish me luck for the future.

Bobolicios  (Level: 116.8 - Posts: 1745)
Tue, 16th Jun '09 4:14 PM

My birthday is July 14, Barnie I will be thinking of you. I have had quite of few days and I hope to have more.

Sandracam  (Level: 149.3 - Posts: 4190)
Tue, 16th Jun '09 4:16 PM

Here's to July babies!
Barnie, sounds like you've had a very interesting life!

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