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Pennwoman  (Level: 152.3 - Posts: 2478)
Sun, 19th Jul '09 9:34 AM


*While I sat in the reception area of my doctor's office, a woman
rolled an elderly man in a wheelchair into the room. As she went to
the receptionist's desk, the man sat there, alone and silent. Just
as I was thinking I should make small talk with him, a little boy
slipped off his mother's lap and walked over to the wheelchair.
Placing his hand on the man's, he said, 'I know how you feel. My
mom makes me ride in the stroller too.'.*
* * **
*As I was nursing my baby, my cousin's six-year-old daughter,
Krissy, came into the room. Never having seen anyone breast feed
before, she was intrigued and full of all kinds of questions about
what I was doing. After mulling over my answers, she remarked, 'My
mom has some of those, but I don't think she knows how to use them.'*
* * **
*Out bicycling one day with my eight-year-old granddaughter,
Carolyn, I got a little wistful. 'In ten years,' I said, 'you'll
want to be with your friends and you won't go walking, biking, and
swimming with me like you do now. Carolyn shrugged. 'In ten years
you'll be too old to do all those things anyway.'*
* * **
*Working as a pediatric nurse, I had the difficult assignment of
giving immunization shots to children. One day I entered the
examining room to give four-year-old Lizzie her needle. 'No, no,
no!' she screamed. 'Lizzie,' scolded her mother, 'that's not polite
behavior.' With that, the girl yelled even louder, 'No, thank you!
No, thank you!*
* * **
*On the way back from a Cub Scout meeting, my grandson asked my son
the question. 'Dad, I know that babies come from mommies' tummies,
but how do they get there in the first place?' he asked innocently.
After my son hemmed and hawed awhile, my grandson finally spoke up
in disgust. 'You don't have to make something up, Dad. It's OK if
you don't know the answer.'*
* * **
*Just before I was deployed to Iraq , I sat my eight-year-old son
down and broke the news to him. 'I'm going to be away for a long
time,' I told him. 'I'm going to Iraq .' 'Why?' he asked. 'Don't
you know there's a war going on over there?'*
* * * *
*Paul Newman founded the Hole in the Wall Gang Camp for children
stricken with cancer, AIDS and blood diseases. One afternoon he and
his wife, Joanne Woodward, stopped by to have lunch with the kids. A
counselor at a nearby table, suspecting the young patients wouldn't
know that Newman was a famous movie star, explained, 'That's the man
who made this camp possible. Maybe you've seen his picture on his
salad dressing bottle?' Blank stares. 'Well, you've probably seen
his face on his lemonade carton.' An eight-year-old girl perked up.
'How long was he missing?'*
* * * *
* His wife's grave side service was just barely finished, when there
was a massive clap of thunder, followed by a tremendous bolt of
lightning, accompanied by even more thunder rumbling in the
distance. The little old man looked at the pastor and calmly said,
'Well, she's there.*

Smoke  (Level: 96.7 - Posts: 12009)
Sun, 19th Jul '09 10:34 AM

Me too! "No thank you! No thank you!" and "Well, she's there." cracked me up.

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