You are not signed in (Login or Join Free)   |   Help
Sploofus Trivia
Trivia GamesCommunityLeaderboardsTournaments
MySploofus
You are here:  Home  >>  Chat Forums  >>  The Salty Dog  >>  View Chat Message

View Chat Message



Pages:  1    


pennwoman
Pennwoman  (Level: 155.2 - Posts: 2478)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 10:39 AM

SEX! SEX! SEX!

Ha! Got your attention.
So, I am going to give this thread LOTS of wandering room. I started to date a man, a few months ago, and he was perfectly nice, the sex was bad, really, really bad. I won't get graphic, but will just say, not sure why he left the living room, because things where over for him, before getting to the bedroom, and THEN he announced his need for Viagra.... it was REALLY bad. I didn't see him again, and frankly was glad I discovered this early in the relationship.

So, how important is sex, in relationship? Is it a deal breaker for you? Have you ended a relationship because of the sex?
How old where you, your first time? Was it memorable? Have you had a really horrible date? I have a horrible date story, but its involved, I'll just say, it's why I got a answering machine, just to screen his calls. So, dish!

jank0614
Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 10:56 AM

sex sex sex must be the number of the breast





smokydevil
Smokydevil  (Level: 163.0 - Posts: 5381)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 11:47 AM

So, how important is sex, in relationship? Is it a deal breaker for you? Have you ended a relationship because of the sex?
How old where you, your first time? Was it memorable? Have you had a really horrible date? I have a horrible date story, but its involved, I'll just say, it's why I got a answering machine, just to screen his calls. So, dish!

Okay, I'll be brave. On my list sex is pretty important, and yes it can be a deal breaker for me. I have not however ended a relationship primarily because of the sex, but it was a minor factor in one breakup. I can say that when I was 19, I dated a Christian girl who said she had to dump me because she didn't think she could control herself sexually around me. Weird, because I thought I was doing just fine in the self control department personally.

I had it in my head that was I going to wait for marriage, and I made it until I was 21 before I broke the ice. It certainly wasn't the best sex, lol, and that was partly I think now because of who is it with, but it was alright. I guess I thought engaged was good enough. Funny thing was that girl NEVER believed I was a virgin, always thought I was lying about that. I do have a horrible date story....but because it makes me look bad I probably won't tell it.

alvandy
Alvandy  (Level: 229.7 - Posts: 7573)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 12:18 PM

This thread has real POTENTIAL!

"I learned the truth at seventeen" that I knew nothin' bout birthing babies or sex.
Sneaky song reference there

I was very shy and a soda jerk to boot. Started working at Ziegler's Drug Store in York right after graduating high school. Kept working there while attending York College.

At age 19, my first [and only ] girl friend and wife "to be" would visit me while working the soda fountain n the drug store. I was a formidable "Jeopardy" player and trivia addict even then, and that impressed her. She also liked my skills making cherry cokes; sundaes, orange freezes , etc.
Often, while serving her an awesome chocolate marshmallow peanut sundae, she would ask me if I wanted her cherry.
It took awhile before the light came on.
The light came on at age 20. It was memorable. That's all I can contribute.

But - Inquiring minds wanna know more- SYL- any thing else to add?
This thread has real POTENTIAL !






clevercloggs
Clevercloggs  (Level: 27.4 - Posts: 1246)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 12:34 PM

So, how important is sex, in relationship? >>>>>>>>>>A lot depends on age, and your own libido. Many, though not all people, find sex is less important as they get older. Many find "a cuddle" is at least as important as swapping bodily fluids in their later years. Sex doesn't HAVE to mean full intercourse either of course. I once fell in love with somebody online, and i'd have been the first to dismiss that, until it happened to me.

Is it a deal breaker for you? Have you ended a relationship because of the sex? >>>>>>>>>>>>I haven't, and in my mid fifties, i doubt i ever will. When i say i haven't, i've stopped a relationship forming because a female was not "up to the challenge". But i was much younger.

How old where you, your first time? Was it memorable?>>>>>>>>>>>Thirteen. More memorable for me than for her i fancy. She was sixteen. Her dad came in as i was "basking in the glory". I had to jump out of her bedroom window.

Have you had a really horrible date? >>>>>>>>>Not really 'orrible. There's been a few i could have lived without though.



goddess28
Goddess28  (Level: 92.6 - Posts: 5236)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 1:07 PM

Absolute deal breaker.

collioure
Collioure  (Level: 105.1 - Posts: 9952)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 2:16 PM

For me it's not the most important aspect, but it has to be an aspect. I rather consider it as a glue that helps cement the relationship.

I have no bad experiences to report, but then again I never rush things with a companion. If it has been someone with real long term relationship, it arrives by mutual consent and desire.

Keep trying, Martina. No guts, no glory. It only takes one, but you have to screen many to find.

pennwoman
Pennwoman  (Level: 155.2 - Posts: 2478)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 4:27 PM

Yay Goddess!
It is a deal breaker for me now. I was always a fan, of sex, that is, but was married, for 6 years and then in a relationship, for 15 plus years.
And then, there was the "oh, THIS is what all the fuss is about" sex. Must have something to do with being comfortable with my age, and finally stopped worrying about if my body was perfect, if I was perfect, etc.

I was nineteen and married my first lover. I was very naive -- I went to nursing school, having never heard the word penis outloud.... I thought it was pronounced PEN - is, rather than PEEN- is.... silly me.

I learned much about intimacy, from my husband..... but not in a good way... the last year of the marriage, he NEVER came into physical contact with me, unless he wanted sex..... at that point, it was like having a bucket of ice water thrown on me, when he touched me..... it was in a class to learn how to start IV's on patients, when the instructor took my arm ---- and I jumped, as I hadn't had an adult touch me in so long..... then I knew my marriage was doomed. I LIKE being a touchy/feely person with my man!

bobolicios
Bobolicios  (Level: 118.8 - Posts: 1745)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 9:08 PM

I would never, never, never, never, never stay with a person without not good sex, but phenominal sex. It is just plain and simple a prerequisite especially at the beginning. It won't always stay blazing hot, but if it is great in the beginning that tells me alot. Bad sex, for men, no such thing I guess, although I have been told different. I have to have that chemistry and everything that goes with it. The sight the smell the fluttering of the heart and the technical skills either ya got it or ya don't. Viagra, pluezzze what a turn off!!!!!! I guess that makes me sound superficial but I am anything but, believe me.

lodi
Lodi  (Level: 98.8 - Posts: 2144)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 9:33 PM

Definite deal breaker.

lucimoore
Lucimoore  (Level: 183.6 - Posts: 1684)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 10:15 PM

He's perfect - handsome, ripped, a real 10, BUT:

when having sex, he always moans out "I'm da man" at the point of orgasm.


Deal Breaker!






bobolicios
Bobolicios  (Level: 118.8 - Posts: 1745)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 10:24 PM

Absoluty Lucy you said it! For me, my heart usually goes right along with the sex. They are pretty much intertwined, its a definite deal breaker.

asor
Asor  (Level: 156.0 - Posts: 589)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 10:52 PM

Luci, you should have just replied, "Well, ONE of 'em, anyway..."

buchanan
Buchanan  (Level: 81.3 - Posts: 339)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 10:54 PM

It's been sooooooooo long ago,I'm not sure I can remember,I think I was 16-17yrs old.I won't go into great detail but,I remember a guy I dated for awhile,I believe I stayed with him because we loved to dance and were good together dancing,he wasn't handsome but not bad,he treated me rightbut the SEX I'm not sure what the hell happened,he'd go thru the motions but the motions weren't succesful.I dated a man and had a child with him and I loved him then and now but bless his soul,he died several yrs ago and believe it or not,I was a nurse in the nursing home his supposed hell of a wife put him in and I had to act professional around him or lose my job but I got a few kisses & hugs with him.Life is Hell at times and I sure do miss him.Eventually I got remarried,we had sex for a short while & he went through the viagra bit but he has a bad heart & couldn't take it.But I'm still with him and plan to be til the end.My parents were devout Catholics and did I have to do some work doing all I did dating.I didn't mean to write a disertation. buchanan

lucimoore
Lucimoore  (Level: 183.6 - Posts: 1684)
Sat, 21st Nov '09 11:17 PM

Disclaimer!!!!!! This is just an example taken from a definition. Not an example of my husband. We will be married 40 years the 29th of this month and I can guarantee you he is the man but would never be so crude. I do all the dirty talk.

salzypat
Salzypat  (Level: 156.5 - Posts: 5316)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 12:17 AM

OK, I'm the odd one in the group - or else the others who think as I do are avoiding this thread.

For me, sex is OK within a marriage. I cannot see myself having a sexual relationship outside of marriage, so if I were to face this issue, it would be on the wedding night and it's a little late to back out then.

When you are younger and the hormones are in control, sex seems a lot more important. At my age, there are a great many other things that are higher in importance than sex. I think at the top of my list would be a man who thought I was the greatest thing since sliced bread, and treated me accordingly. He would have to be of highest integrity, funny, intelligent, patient (because I'm not always patient) and in good health. (No sense looking for someone with worse health than I have! ) It goes without saying that he would have to love my animals as much as I do. It would be a plus if he liked to clean house!

If all of that was present, then a sexual relationship would most likely also be present. If it wasn't, it sure wouldn't be a deal breaker for me. I'd much rather have a loving and caring husband without sex than an ego-centric husband with sex.



sandracam
Sandracam  (Level: 149.3 - Posts: 4190)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 1:56 AM

Deal breaker unfortunately. Have you ever been SO into someone, then the sex is bad? Very sad, but like Col said, it's the glue that holds it all together.

chickfbref1
Chickfbref1  (Level: 120.7 - Posts: 2012)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 1:59 AM

I don't believe in sex...I'm married.

HRH...Me.

bobolicios
Bobolicios  (Level: 118.8 - Posts: 1745)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 4:32 AM

That happened to me when I was married, chick, thats why I am not married anymore!!! Pat don't get mad but Donna Reed is from the 50's you are a throw back! I don't mean sex is the only important thing but I couldn't have a relationship with a man without it. I would rather have no sex than bad sex.


collioure
Collioure  (Level: 105.1 - Posts: 9952)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 6:11 AM

Whatsamatter wid all dese guys ????

You gotta listen to the lady. It's a shared expewience.

Da hugs and kisses is BERRY important.

PS If bad sex is a deal breaker and there are so many lousy lovers out there, you may as well get it over with early on. Ay yi yi!

felix
Felix  (Level: 109.3 - Posts: 2500)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:10 AM

Bad Sex?

goddess28
Goddess28  (Level: 92.6 - Posts: 5236)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:11 AM

Strangely enough, it seems women are the only ones who experience it?

felix
Felix  (Level: 109.3 - Posts: 2500)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:13 AM

Well stuttering during sex talk might be a clue.

goddess28
Goddess28  (Level: 92.6 - Posts: 5236)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:25 AM

but,

goddess28
Goddess28  (Level: 92.6 - Posts: 5236)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:25 AM

but,

goddess28
Goddess28  (Level: 92.6 - Posts: 5236)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:25 AM

but,

felix
Felix  (Level: 109.3 - Posts: 2500)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 10:26 AM

I see it every day.

jank0614
Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 12:44 PM

I too am a sex within marriage girl.

It would never be a deal breaker. Where there is love, technique can be learned, and there would be lots of fun learning how to improve.

salzypat
Salzypat  (Level: 156.5 - Posts: 5316)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 3:10 PM

LOL!! Bobo, I am 71 years old. I was married in 1957, so I AM from the Donna Reed era. We didn't have "the pill" and if you got pregnant you were married within a few days of finding out you were expecting, or you were sent off to a home or a far distant relative until the baby was born. You gave the baby up for adoption probably without ever seeing the baby or knowing if it was a boy or a girl. In those days the adoption records were sealed, so you never knew where your child went.

I'm glad we don't do that to young mothers any more. My granddaughter is a good example. She had my first great-grandchild the summer between her junior and senior year in high school. She's had good support from her parents, but she has been raising Kevin alone. The father has disappeared from the scene. I'm so glad she was able to keep Kevin.

In the '50s we weren't so scared of sexually transmitted diseases because we just didn't hear much about them. But fear of pregnancy is a good deterrent to sex before marriage.

Obviously I wouldn't have that problem now (!) but fear has been replaced by a moral choice I have made. It's what works for me. It might not be for everyone.

As for calling me Donna Reed, I have been called a whole lot worse!

sargon
Sargon  (Level: 112.0 - Posts: 1256)
Sun, 22nd Nov '09 9:52 PM

If you had a husband that you loved what would you do if he was injured (physical or medical). Would you divorce him?

salzypat
Salzypat  (Level: 156.5 - Posts: 5316)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 12:48 AM

No


bobolicios
Bobolicios  (Level: 118.8 - Posts: 1745)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 4:10 AM

Jan you are just not of this world period. Come on now, if you have love then technique can be learned, it isn't cooking class honey. You can't be that naive.

jank0614
Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 6:44 AM

This thread was not built for attack, Bobo. Please keep it in TT.

pennwoman
Pennwoman  (Level: 155.2 - Posts: 2478)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 10:29 AM

Ok, let me tell you about worst date ever ... believe it or not, "mr. done in the living room" was not the worst... dating sucks!
I was young, newly divorced, ready get back out there........ my sister and I went to a popular club in Pittsburgh, while there, I met a man, who seemed nice, and we talked for a while. He told me, he was a Head Hunter, and that he did some work with the Pittsburgh Symphony. He went on and on about the symphony, and asked me to go to a concert that week.... he said, with his connections that we would be sitting in the "dress circle" and went on, about it being very exclusive.... I had never been, and had no idea what "dress circle" meant, so I went and bought new dress and shoes and bag. I met him there, and within seconds I realized things were not going to go well. He walked me around Heinz Hall ( gorgeous, btw) and as he ran into people, I realized that most of them where making a big effort NOT to cross his path.... weird. Well, it turns out, that he didn't head hunt for the symphony as much as he sold subscriptions for them..... and we could not go to the "dress circle" until lights went down, and then would be using seats, that no one showed up for.....when intermission came, we lingered around the bar area..... he postioned us as far away from the bar as possible, until I offered to buy us drinks, then he lit up like a Christmas tree..... then he told me how he got our tickets for free... and then was on a rant about how expensive everything was in the city.... at last intermission was over. Finally the concert was over. I forgot to mention, that it was "Presidents Night" at the symphony, the Presidents of many area corporations, where in attendence and they announced there would be a "thank you for contributing" event after the concert was over. We were making our way out, descending a magnificent staircase, in a crowd of people, when he noticed what had been set up for Presidents night.......... he stopped, grabbed me by both shoulders and said
LOOK! FREE FOOD!!!!
and then hit the incredible desert bar, like Donner party, discovering Old Country Buffet....
He heaped every kind of desert he could fit on his plate.... we discovered a quiet corner (discovered, HA, I was so mortified, I was hiding as much as possible" he went back for THIRDs, it was just obscene.
Finally, I had enough, and told him I had to leave, at which, he began to whine about how, he was going to need a bus, then a ticket for the incline and then the long walk home........and somehow, badgered me into taking him home (he must have been a great salesman), we walked to my car, and the cheap bastard, didn't even offer to pay my parking cost... I took him home, dropped him offer, and vowed never again.
He, however, apparently had a wonderful time, he called me for MONTHS, I bought my first answering machine, just so I could screen his calls.
Dating is not for the timid.

jank0614
Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 10:51 AM

Worst date.

I was getting to know the most gorgeous man on earth, 6'6", handsome beyond Brendan Fraser (though he could have been his stand in). Fourth time we hung out, he had picked me up and swung me around, smiling that smile you ladies all know - the one that says he's really happy to spend time with you and you're really special to him.

He went to church with me, met my friends. We had met for dinner a few times, I had hung out with him at his work.

He invited me out, but asked me to meet me at his apartment and leave from there after he got off work.

When I got there, he was not ready yet, still dressed in shorts and t-shirt. To my horror, though I'd never seen such a thing except in awareness photos, I saw his legs were covered in track marks (or at least that's all I could figure out all of that mess could be). His eyes were rolling up into his head. I went to the bathroom and in plain sight was all his drug paraphernalia.

I left. I talked with him later about it, and found out he had been through rehab 3 times and just couldn't kick his habits.

I cried and drove and drove, working through my disappointment/hurt. But I'm glad I found out so soon in the relationship before I cared even more for him.

dona
Dona  (Level: 204.1 - Posts: 14)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 11:19 AM

So ... HRH responded so I can as well.
If you ask a 16 year old ... A+, every ten minutes please. All sex is good, some better. But, alas, I am not 16.
Now that I am what I am ... 67, I think sex is critical but it is quite unfair to expect your spouse to be everything ... In fact, she bats about 90% which is probably more than I deserve.

Somewhere between 16 and 67 I changed, perhaps slowly like the frog on the stove being cooked from cold water. I do recall hoping for sex and getting nothing and thinking I was deprived but then, I began to realize that many things were more important (ask Smaug ... He has a whole bunch of threads on this subject).

Love making IS critical. However you define it, you have to have it.

collioure
Collioure  (Level: 105.1 - Posts: 9952)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 2:30 PM

Girls, girls, girls!

How do you get yourselves into these predicaments?

Your first meeting should be about an hour over a cup of coffee in a place where you are comfortable near YOUR home. Find out if he meets your criteria before any real date. Then you can proceed to a simple dinner or such.

pennwoman
Pennwoman  (Level: 155.2 - Posts: 2478)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 5:27 PM


"Your first meeting should be about an hour over a cup of coffee in a place where you are comfortable near YOUR home. Find out if he meets your criteria before any real date. Then you can proceed to a simple dinner or such." I agree, and that is exactly my first date senario, I much prefer, driving myself, and meeting in high traffic kind of area, for first real meeting

Second worst date.
I met a man, and agreed to coffee, we talked for nearly 2 hours, it was lovely. I spoke to him on the phone several times, and he asked me to dinner. He said, he had something he had to discuss with me, before we went further in our relationship.
So off to dinner we went.
He, was in prison, for possession of child pornography for 2 years, and is a registered sex offender.
I had no difficulty at all, ending the relationship, such as it was. He, seemed to think, we had some magical connection, and was apparently very enamored of me. I was having none of it.



bobolicios
Bobolicios  (Level: 118.8 - Posts: 1745)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 5:35 PM

I hate to be so crass in criticizm but I guess I have much better radar than you ladies. However, I do admit to staying with a total alcoholic for a year and a half. However, I was a heavy drinker at the time as well, Dave was the funniest man I ever met though. The sex was awesome and he is a great person but he is terrible at responsiblity, money, committment, and being able to stay sober for longer than 24 hours. Other than that he is great.

oogie54
Oogie54  (Level: 201.7 - Posts: 1120)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 10:04 PM

My ex had the annoying habit of wanting to talk on the phone during sex....and she always called me.

lucimoore
Lucimoore  (Level: 183.6 - Posts: 1684)
Mon, 23rd Nov '09 10:14 PM



clevercloggs
Clevercloggs  (Level: 27.4 - Posts: 1246)
Tue, 24th Nov '09 1:56 AM

I've just finished with my latest conquest. I asked why she never talked dirty to me when she's aroused. She said "Because you're never there".............................

barnierubble
Barnierubble  (Level: 93.9 - Posts: 637)
Tue, 24th Nov '09 5:43 AM

NO SEX PLEASE WE ARE BRITISH.

Ideal sex is not something that happens overnight, anyone can have an OFFDAY, but is developed over many lovi ng, caring moments. So glad i did not meet you when i was courting.

pennwoman
Pennwoman  (Level: 155.2 - Posts: 2478)
Tue, 24th Nov '09 10:57 AM

Of course, sex, gets better with time, but I still stand by chemistry, if, it's not there at the start, I truly believe it isn't going to magically happen with time. That being said, sex with out love, gets old quick, too, even if the technique is great.

buchanan
Buchanan  (Level: 81.3 - Posts: 339)
Tue, 24th Nov '09 8:58 PM

Pennwoman,You should have taken him to Judge Judy or maybe she hadn't shown up yet with her sarcastic,rude mouth,buchanan


Pages:  1    



Copyright © 2003-2016 Sploofus Holdings LLC.  All rights reserved.
Legal Notice & Privacy Statement  |  Link to Sploofus