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Donden  (Level: 112.5 - Posts: 2127)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 3:26 PM


Remember, omly Irish coffee provides in a single cup all four essential food groups:
Alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Onward and upward!~

Soldotna  (Level: 27.7 - Posts: 145)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 3:47 PM

Erin Go Bragh!!

Felix  (Level: 109.3 - Posts: 2500)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 4:42 PM

What's Irish and stays out all night?

Bushyfox  (Level: 174.4 - Posts: 2403)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 5:19 PM

My St. Paddy's Day avatar and the red hair show where the Bushyfox ancestry originated!

Happy Irish Day to all!

Joanneeberlin  (Level: 181.9 - Posts: 686)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 6:12 PM

What a beautiful avatar Bev, really beautiful and so irish! Our big event in Montreal is the 179th annual St Patrick's Day Parade this Sunday. Hope some of you heard of it. It is one of the longest parades in history - about three hours long (some years). Here's a good web site for all the Irish Info happening in Montreal. Happy St Paddy's Everyone!!!

Geophile  (Level: 157.2 - Posts: 1510)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 8:19 PM

Our daughter was an Irish dancer and made it to the world championships in Dublin back in the 80's...what a time we had. However, if I never hear another note of Irish dancing music it will be okay with me...I discovered the reason the Irish drink. Traditional Irish music is great...just the dancing music, over and over again!

Joanneeberlin  (Level: 181.9 - Posts: 686)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 9:00 PM

Felix, my answer to that one would be "MY EX"

Jo (LOL)

Kaufman  (Level: 254.1 - Posts: 3936)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 9:06 PM

Felix: O'Ryan the Hunter?

Aslan  (Level: 27.6 - Posts: 356)
Thu, 15th Mar '07 10:07 PM

May those who love us love us.
And those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if He doesn't turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we'll know them by their limping.

Missashlee  (Level: 125.6 - Posts: 543)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 2:02 AM

There are a couple of threads from last year worth revisiting:

More Irish proverbs:

Some Irish jokes:

Felix  (Level: 109.3 - Posts: 2500)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 7:24 AM

The answers is easy: Patty O'Furniture!

Bushyfox  (Level: 174.4 - Posts: 2403)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 7:35 AM

Hahaha at Felix

Here's another'un:~


For a holiday, an Irishman decided to go to Switzerland to fulfill a
lifelong dream and climb the Matterhorn. He hired a guide and just as
they neared the top, the men were caught in a snow slide.

Three hours later, a Saint Bernard plowed through to them, a keg of
brandy tied under its chin.

"Hooray!" shouted the guide. "Here comes man's best friend!"

"Yeah," said the Irishman. "An' look at the size of the dog that's
bringin' it."


Bushyfox  (Level: 174.4 - Posts: 2403)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 4:30 PM


Three Irishmen, Paddy, Sean and Seamus, were stumbling home from the
pub late one night and found themselves on the road which led past
the old graveyard.

"Come have a look over here," says Paddy, "It's Michael O'Grady's
grave, God bless his soul. He lived to the ripe old age of 87."

"That's nothing," says Sean, "here's one named Patrick O'Toole, it
says here that he was 95 when he died."

Just then, Seamus yells out, "Good God, here's a fella that got to be

"What was his name?" asks Paddy.

Seamus stumbles around a bit, awkwardly lights a match to see what
else is written on the stone marker, and exclaims, "Miles, from

Tuzilla  (Level: 131.1 - Posts: 3769)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 5:58 PM

Following a shipwreck, a son of the Emerald Isle found himself stranded on a tropical island. Fortunately there was plenty of fruits and such to eat, and netting fish in a small lagoon with his makeshift net gave him meat to eat. Still, he was alone and stranded. One day a weird bottle washed up on the shore. He picked it up and out pops a genie.

"Thanks for freeing me," exclaims the genie. "I will grant you two wishes."

"I though you gave people three wishes," said the Irishman.

"I have only been in there a short time," replied the genie, "so I can only give you two. Please make your first wish."

"Well," said the Irishman, "I have been stranded here without a drop of Irish whiskey to drink for months. I would certainly favor some."

POOF! a small flask appears at his feet. He picks it up and smell the contents. It is Irish Whiskey. He downs it in short order and looks to the genie.

"My, that was the finest whiskey I have ever tasted," he said. "And i don't want to seem ungrateful, but I had expected more."

"Look at the flask," replies the genie. He looks and it is full. "This flask will never run dry for all eternity."

"Truly a marvel," exclaims the Irishman, who proceeds to drain it 3 more times.

"Now for your second wish" say the genie. "Do you want to be sent home? Do you want a companion? How about riches beyond compare?"

"Well," muses the Irishman. "I am thinking I want another one of those flasks."

Marynuala  (Level: 131.4 - Posts: 994)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 6:21 PM

Nothing like Irish logic! Here are three good ones:-

As the funeral procession went by, the American tourist inquired of a Dublin policeman
"Who's dead?"
"I wouldn’t know that now Sir" the policeman replied, "But I think it’s the person in the first car".

It was Saturday morning when Sean heard a knock at the door. Outside stood a debt collector. "I've come to find out why you haven't made any payments on the double glazing you’ve had fitted". he said to Sean.
"Don't ask me." said Sean "Ask the salesman. Sure he said the stuff would pay for itself in six months! ".

The O’Leary twins had stumbled across a dead horse.
"What shall we do with it?" asked Pat
"Let's raffle it," said Joseph. "£2 a ticket, limited sale of 200 tickets."
"But what happens when the winner finds out it's dead?" reasoned Pat
"Ah that’s no problem, we'll give him his money back!" his brother replied.

Happy Paddy's Day!

Maurlin  (Level: 211.2 - Posts: 2660)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 7:08 PM

I like Kaufman's answer too!!!

Felix  (Level: 109.3 - Posts: 2500)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 7:12 PM

Another favorite is the one that starts with the question: What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral..............

Aslan  (Level: 27.6 - Posts: 356)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 7:30 PM

"...What's the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral..."

One less drunk.

Smoke20  (Level: 62.6 - Posts: 2815)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 8:02 PM

More to the Irish than an unfortunate susceptiblility to alcohol abuse.

An Irish Airman Foresees His Death
by W B Yeats
I know that I shall meet my fate
Somewhere among the clouds above:
Those that I fight I do not hate,
Those that I guard I do not love:
My country is Kiltartan Cross,
My countrymen Kiltartan's poor,
No likely end could bring them loss
Or leave them happier than before.
Nor law, nor duty bade me fight,
Nor public men, nor cheering crowds,
A lonely impulse of delight
Drove to this tumult in the clouds;
I balanced all, brought all to mind,
The years to come seemed waste of breath,
A waste of breath the years behind
In balance with this life, this death.

Aslan  (Level: 27.6 - Posts: 356)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 9:24 PM

Marynuala: speaking of Irish and twins...

A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink.

"Why of course," comes the reply.

The first man then asks: "Where are you from?"

"I'm from Ireland," replies the second man.

The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland."

"Of Course," replies the second man.

Curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?"

"Dublin," comes the reply.

"I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin."

"Of course," replies the second man.

Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?"

"Saint Mary's," replies the second man. "I graduated in '62."

"This is unbelievable!" the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!"

About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender.

"Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Malley twins are drunk again."

Nickdanger  (Level: 150.8 - Posts: 62)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 9:30 PM

"Did you hear? Mike's Irish!"

"Oh, really!"

"No, O'Riley."

Ladyvol  (Level: 203.0 - Posts: 5438)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 9:56 PM

A little Irish blessings for ye...
May ye be in Heaven a half hour afore the devil knows your dead....

Smoke20  (Level: 62.6 - Posts: 2815)
Fri, 16th Mar '07 10:47 PM

No poet like an Irish poet:

Two Lorries
by Seamus Heaney

It's raining on black coal and warm wet ashes.
There are tyre-marks in the yard, Agnew's old lorry
Has all its cribs down and Agnew the coalman
With his Belfast accent's sweet-talking my mother.
Would she ever go to a film in Magherafelt?
But it's raining and he still has half the load

To deliver farther on. This time the lode
Our coal came from was silk-black, so the ashes
Will be the silkiest white. The Magherafelt
(Via Toomebridge) bus goes by. The half-stripped lorry
With its emptied, folded coal-bags moves my mother:
The tasty ways of a leather-aproned coalman!

And films no less! The conceit of a coalman...
She goes back in and gets out the black lead
And emery paper, this nineteen-forties mother,
All business round her stove, half-wiping ashes
With a backhand from her cheek as the bolted lorry
Gets revved and turned and heads for Magherafelt

And the last delivery. Oh, Magherafelt!
Oh, dream of red plush and a city coalman
As time fastforwards and a different lorry
Groans into shot, up Broad Street, with a payload
That will blow the bus station to dust and ashes...
After that happened, I'd a vision of my mother,

A revenant on the bench where I would meet her
In that cold-floored waiting room in Magherafelt,
Her shopping bags full up with shovelled ashes.
Death walked out past her like a dust-faced coalman
Refolding body-bags, plying his load
Empty upon empty, in a flurry

Of motes and engine-revs, but which lorry
Was it now? Young Agnew's or that other,
Heavier, deadlier one, set to explode
In a time beyond her time in Magherafelt...
So tally bags and sweet-talk darkness, coalman,
Listen to the rain spit in new ashes

As you heft a load of dust that was Magherafelt,
Then reappear from your lorry as my mother's
Dreamboat coalman filmed in silk-white ashes.

Bushyfox  (Level: 174.4 - Posts: 2403)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 1:04 AM


An Irishman who had a little too much to drink is driving home from
the city one night and, of course, his car is weaving violently all
over the road. A cop pulls him over.

"So," says the cop to the driver, "where have ya been?"

"Why, I've been to the pub of course," slurs the drunk.

"Well," says the cop, "it looks like you've had quite a few to drink
this evening."

"I did all right," the drunk says with a smile.

"Did you know," says the cop, standing straight and folding his arms
across his chest, "that a few intersections back, your wife fell out
of your car?"

"Oh, thank heavens," sighs the drunk. "For a minute there, I thought
I'd gone deaf."

Smoke20  (Level: 62.6 - Posts: 2815)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 1:16 AM

Once more with drunkenness:

by Louis MacNeice

The room was suddenly rich and the great bay-window was
Spawning snow and pink roses against it
Soundlessly collateral and incompatible:
World is suddener than we fancy it.

World is crazier and more of it than we think,
Incorrigibly plural. I peel and portion
A tangerine and spit the pips and feel
The drunkenness of things being various.

And the fire flames with a bubbling sound for world
Is more spiteful and gay than one supposes -
On the tongue on the eyes on the ears in the palms of one's hands -
There is more than glass between the snow and the huge roses.

Missashlee  (Level: 125.6 - Posts: 543)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 3:23 AM

ty, Donna, for the poems!

Gypsylady  (Level: 141.0 - Posts: 6037)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 4:04 AM

Happy St. Patrick's Day to everybody! I don't have a poem, but enjoyed all of yours, and my ancestors were Irish.


Lisap369  (Level: 61.1 - Posts: 992)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 10:29 AM

A hearty happy St. Patrick's Day from Quebec City - we are supposed to leave for home today but are stranded due to the last hurrah from Old Man Winter. I've decided to wait it out and drive home tomorrow so we will be celebrating in old world french style! p.s. I cannot believe the amount of snow falling here!!! Check out my profile pic.. i took it this morning!!

Gypsylady  (Level: 141.0 - Posts: 6037)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 10:48 AM

Just checked it out on your profile! Huge snowflakes!


Bushyfox  (Level: 174.4 - Posts: 2403)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 4:40 PM


Brenda O'Malley is home making dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan
arrives at her door.

"Brenda, may I come in?" he asks. "I've somethin' to tell ya."
"Of course you can come in, you're always welcome, Tim. But where's my husband?"

"That's what I'm here to be tellin' ya, Brenda. There was an accident down at the Guinness brewery..."

"Oh, God no!" cries Brenda. "Please don't tell me..."

"I must, Brenda. Your husband Seamus is dead and gone. I'm sorry."

Finally, she looked up at Tim. "How did it happen, Tim?"

"It was terrible, Brenda. He fell into a vat of Guinness Stout and drowned."

"Oh my! But you must tell me true, Tim. Did he at least go

"Well, no Brenda ... no. Fact is, he got out three times to go to the bathroom.."

Smoke20  (Level: 62.6 - Posts: 2815)
Sat, 17th Mar '07 4:49 PM

40 Shades of Green
by Johnny Cash

I close my eyes and picture the emerald of the sea
from the fishin boats at Dingle to the shores at Dunehea
I miss the River Shannon and the folks at Skibbereen
the moorlands and meadows and their Forty Shades of Green

But most of all I miss a girl in Tipperary town
and most of all I miss her lips as soft as eiderdown
I long again to see and do the things we´ve done and seen
where the breeze is sweet as shalimar and there´s Forty Shades of Green

I wish that I could spend an hour at Dublin´s churning suft
I long to watch the farmers drain the bogs and spade the turf
to see again the thatching of the straw the women clean
I´d walk from Cork to Larne to see those Forty Shades of Green

But most of all I miss a girl in Tipperary town
and most of all I miss her lips as soft as eiderdown
I long again to see and do the things we´ve done and seen
where the breeze is sweet as Shalimar and there´s Forty Shades of Green

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