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farroz
Farroz  (Level: 90.5 - Posts: 40)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 6:25 PM

QUESTION TO ALL THE PARENTS?

My mom is feeling worried because my niece and nephew fight constantly. They are 8 and 6. She seems to think this in not normal, I thought it was, what do you think?

And...

How many times has your kids ran off in the middle of the store and scared the pants off you?



redbaron
Redbaron  (Level: 198.1 - Posts: 296)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 6:34 PM

I only have one child (seven year old boy), but I had a brother when I was growing up [er, still have a brother ], who was about two years (slightly more) younger than I was. We sure had our share of fights, and at that age, too.

To answer the question, first you have to define "fight." Are they injuring each other? Or is it just the normal arguing and rough-housing that all kids do?

As for running off in the store, the answer is "zero," fortunately. That would scare the heck out of my wife and me. But one thing our kid seems to have an innate understanding for is safety issues, fortunately. When he was two he didn't want to go down the cleaning supply aisle at the store with his mom because of all the "no-nos" there. He seemed to get the message early, and he knows that running off is dangerous.

Will

deeder
Deeder  (Level: 60.2 - Posts: 48)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 6:53 PM

My brother and I fought like cats and dogs,Now we are thisclose.My kids who are now 18,20 and 24 still fight its normal,I had them run off in the store and hide between the racks of clothes now that scared me to death.

twinboymom2001
Twinboymom2001  (Level: 67.0 - Posts: 197)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 7:08 PM

My little brother and I fought like cats and dogs growing up and now we are very close. I have twin almost 5 year old boys and they love to torment each other, but they can be the best of friends as well. I think it is fairly normal. As for running off, I have one twin that loves to take off and hide in the clothing racks and other usually will stay by my side. I think that's pretty normal too because I do see that I am the only one who doesn't have that problem when I am out shopping.

chickfbref1
Chickfbref1  (Level: 120.7 - Posts: 2012)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 8:15 PM

I have a son who is 7 and a daughter (available on e-bay for shipping only) who is 4. They don't fight. I don't allow it, because I reward positive behaviour...don't even acknowledge the bad...let her scream her bloody head off...and (God help me) she does. If I give into her...hell breaks loose and I won't let the 4 year get the best of me.

Different kids equals different parenting styles. Kids fight...

Just my two cents.

violetblue
Violetblue  (Level: 112.2 - Posts: 850)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 8:29 PM

My three (7, 4 1/2, 2 1/2) mostly get along very well but they definitely argue and fight on occasion. It's totally normal-- they are children with different personalities, after all.

My girls (the older two) never ran off while out in public places. Like Will's son, they seemed understand the potential dangers of that behavior even when very young. Of course, now we have discussed the possibilities at length. However, I fear that my son would run away and never look back. He is fearless that way (or clueless, LOL). It's scary because I know that it only takes a split second of looking away and he could be gone. Ugh! Lately we don't go out as much as I'm used to for that reason (and also because he has entered a most unpleasant phase of tantrum behavior-- throwing himself on the floor and kicking his legs. It's not pretty.)

~Tracy




lettermanfan1
Lettermanfan1  (Level: 88.3 - Posts: 486)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 9:01 PM

2 years apart? Very normal. They'll get along eventually.
My son used to say he was going to one friend's house and then end up somewhere else without calling. Drove me nuts! Took about 3 years to "fix" that!
Leah

ladyvol
Ladyvol  (Level: 205.2 - Posts: 5486)
Fri, 11th Nov '05 10:08 PM

My boys are 20 months apart and they fight more now than they did when they were smaller! (They are 14 and 12)......It's pretty much a normal thing I think...unless they are becoming violent towards each other....that's a whole different ballgame....My kids never ran off from me but they use to embarress the fire out of me in the grocery store. Espically if I were buying female products....one or the other would tell the salesperson that mommy was having PMS attacks......LOL (actually it was worse than that).....
Vickie

skillet66
Skillet66  (Level: 83.5 - Posts: 210)
Sat, 12th Nov '05 12:08 AM

I have a 14 year old child.I have since figured out what caused this and have since almost literally quit doing it.It only took one child for me and no more.I personally think it is very normal for siblings to fight,that is just what they do.Since i have no other children,she and her father fight all the time.It is like two 3 year olds(she hit me first,no, he hit me first,etc...).It is nervewracking to say the least!!When she was younger she would hide in the racks at the stores and pass gas.And I would always find her-just follow the smell and the laughing I heard coming from the rack of clothes.Most embarrassing-I often say I got the wrong baby in the hospital and she's not mine(lol).But luckily we know they usually grow out of this kind of behavior,we just do not know when.Martha

farroz
Farroz  (Level: 90.5 - Posts: 40)
Sat, 12th Nov '05 1:30 AM

Well thank you all. To answer the question, no they do no fight physically they are just always arguing.

aquamar
Aquamar  (Level: 178.6 - Posts: 909)
Sat, 12th Nov '05 2:52 AM

I have 3 girls and 2 boys. My first 2 girls are 5 years apart and they always got along. My third girl and her brother are 2 years apart and are always arguing about this and that. They are now 12 and 10 years old and they still argue. My youngest is 5 so he and his brother are 5 years apart. They get along fine. My thoughts are that siblings that are not at least 5 years apart will probably not argue with each other forever. At least thats my hope.

action23
Action23  (Level: 113.6 - Posts: 180)
Sat, 12th Nov '05 6:53 AM

Wow..........this unbelievable........kids that argue or fight amongst themselves!

I grew up with 3 brothers and 2 sisters and there wasn't more than 2 years separating one from the other. Now raising 4 boys ranging from 9 months old to 24 yrs old. I grew up on benedryl and cold medicine (the kind that makes you sleepy) There was never any time to fight. And so now are my sons. Like me they never fight, just sleep alot! HA! HA! - Just kidding!!!!!!!!!

It's all pretty normal.......ny brother and I had some dusies and had one or two with a sister that was pretty wild . My siblings and I have been very close though, through our adult years. It's just important as parents/adults that we try to maintain the peace and teach them to love one another as well as to forgive. If there's any secret, I would say that it's important for the parents to limit the quarrels and bickerings to behind closed doors and out of the children's direct view and earshot. I would tend to lean on the idead that no matter what we say, it's what we do that they learn from.......BON CHANCE!

action23

citrusy
Citrusy  (Level: 26.2 - Posts: 118)
Sat, 12th Nov '05 8:59 AM

Heck, there are 14 years between me and my sister and we fought like cats and dogs when she was 4 and I was 18. (Of course it was yelling and not physical)
Years have passed since then and we are both (ahem) normal. As long as there is no physical harm, then I say..Advil and a good dose of counting to 10.



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