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Heidi  (Level: 36.2 - Posts: 694)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 12:55 PM


Do not believe I am looking for an answer but just feel the need to share. I will preface by saying i am not religious but do not discount "spiritual". I was married to a Detroit Police Officer for many years-divorced for multiple years. Recently I receeived an e-mail from my X telling me his partner had died. My X and I were bitter during the divorve but have melowed over the years as we share children. When I received the message, I was at a loss for words. So many times I had wished that man dead-police officers often develop a bond with partners that they do not share with their wives-yes, resented that. If I told him how wonderful and how much I bereaved his partner, it would have been the ultimate in hipocrasy. SOO.. I siimply told him that I grieved for him and his partner's wife and son. Also said that TIME had made his partner's memory rather "grow" on me. Told him my only words could be, "I am so very sorry you lost your friend." Like I said, don't know why I felt the need to say this-just did-Linda

Gypsylady  (Level: 148.2 - Posts: 6097)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 1:03 PM

I think you did the right thing, Linda! I've always heard that when expressing feelings for people's losses, sometimes less & fewer words is better and appropriate!


Chyenn  (Level: 209.4 - Posts: 1332)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 1:03 PM

***Told him my only words could be, "I am so very sorry you lost your friend."***

under the circumstances, i think this was the most compassionate, appropriate statement you could have made.

Jeannette  (Level: 114.5 - Posts: 1735)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 2:04 PM

i agree only words you could use well done x

Smaug  (Level: 144.7 - Posts: 2765)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 6:57 PM

You should firmly deny responsibility and lawyer up.

4getful1  (Level: 182.9 - Posts: 3055)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 7:56 PM

Linda, I believe your response was appropriate.


Donden  (Level: 112.5 - Posts: 2127)
Wed, 12th Dec '07 9:28 PM

For years my ex-wife and I had no contact at all even though we lived just blocks apart. Neither of us had anything good to say about each other, (I used the stale expression "Godzilla" to describe her). 16 months ago she died and I felt terrible. I don't know why I'm saying this either,,,but I am.

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