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Okuome1  (Level: 33.0 - Posts: 89)
Thu, 22nd May '08 11:59 AM


The following is an actual question given on a chemistry mid term.
The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question:
Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or
endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using
Boyle's Law
(gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time.
So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate
at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once
a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at
the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of
their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than
one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we
can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as
they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase
in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to
expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of
souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes
So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa
during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell
before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I
slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus
I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen
over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven, thereby
proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last
night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'


Alvandy  (Level: 225.5 - Posts: 7525)
Thu, 22nd May '08 12:03 PM

That was priceless!

Thanks for sharing

Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Thu, 22nd May '08 1:06 PM

Seen it before - don't know how I could have forgotten. Needed it today. Thanks so much!

(Our school ran out of referral forms yesterday - you know, the forms that accompany you to the office for in-school suspension).

I had one of my best little students absolutely lose his mind yesterday - had to call his mom - he cursed his mom and hung up on her. Obviously, he has bigger problems going on than his behavior in my class. I'll be interested to see if he sits comfortably in class today.

Apparently, the number of students losing their mind per diem is diametrically opposed to the number of days remaining before the last day of school, May 30 here.

1mks  (Level: 208.0 - Posts: 5864)
Thu, 22nd May '08 1:18 PM

The last day of school here is June 4th. I have 5 in In School Suspension today. One of them is here for 10 days....seems he was choking another student....the student "was changing colors".....and beginning to lose consciousness. I have been asking myself why he is with me. Were I the parent of the other student, I would have pressed assault charges on the choker so quickly it would have made his head swim. The kids have clearly gone nuts in my area AND seem to be getting by with it. Chaps me to no end!

Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Thu, 22nd May '08 2:12 PM

(In some districts - not where I am now - the police try very hard to keep parents from pressing charges, preferring to let the school handle it - which means, nothing happens and the public doesn't find out about the crap going on in that school.)

I don't understand parents not pressing charges either. Stop it now, or suffer the consequences much greater in the future.

Lisap369  (Level: 61.1 - Posts: 992)
Thu, 22nd May '08 8:01 PM

Very cute.. although I suspect it was written not for a mid term but for a good joke. Great for a laugh.. thanks.

Smokydevil  (Level: 163.0 - Posts: 5381)
Thu, 22nd May '08 8:03 PM

That was hilarious!! Thanks.

Suzer22  (Level: 165.6 - Posts: 1982)
Thu, 22nd May '08 9:54 PM

Hey you teacher types - if you are Beta testing, come join the Teachers Group!

We held graduation tonight (I don't go anymore because I can't stand all the air horns blasting!). But I am happy to say we got through the end of the year without any bleach- or urine-filled balloons being thrown on campus, like there were in past years!

My really terrible, talkative, disrespectful beginners class this year actually wanted to sit in a circle on the last day and all say what they liked and would miss most about Drama Class now that it was over! Now I'm gonna miss 'em, when the day before I was cheering that I would only have to see them once more!

Knerd  (Level: 99.0 - Posts: 1141)
Thu, 22nd May '08 9:59 PM

That was great - thanks for sharing! And to you teachers - God bless you and enjoy your summer!

Rowlanda  (Level: 70.0 - Posts: 2856)
Thu, 22nd May '08 11:44 PM

Did I hear someone say "Enjoy your Summer jobs......."
Most teachers have to work in the Summer to supplement
their salaries and continue to stay in a profession that
doesn't even adequately provide for the necessary tools.
Pencils, Pens, Books etc are inadequate....not to mention
little things like computers....

Rowlanda  (Level: 70.0 - Posts: 2856)
Thu, 22nd May '08 11:47 PM

Sorry Jenny....
Meant to say thank you and that I
thoroughly enjoyed your story....
Went off on a rant again, instead!!!!

Jank0614  (Level: 67.1 - Posts: 4597)
Fri, 23rd May '08 6:53 AM

Oh yeah, I have some students like that.

They irritate everyone and push the rules to the limit every day, then write how much they love you in your yearbook and apologize for being a butthead. Anyway, you smile and hope something somewhere will stick, and move on.

And shed a tear or two for losing the ones you've had for 4 years who actually paid attention, worked hard, and learned something and are graduating on to the next level.

Ok - tears over! On to Summer! Mowing, cleaning, painting ... scrubbing ... mowing ... cleaning .... remodeling ... uh - on to FALL!

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