Funny Quotations About Cows
Billkozy on 05/10/2009
|From the play, "Play With Your Food":|
"You're a vegetarian? Man I wish I had your willpower, I do. That would be nice. But you know what the reality is? I mean without us raising and taking care of all those cows and pigs we keep on farms, they’d die out as a species within the year. Are you kidding me? They wouldn’t last a year out there on their own—those harsh winters without a nice warm barn, all those wolves and foxes out there…well deer would make it because they’re as we say fleet-footed, but the others? Forget it. Years of evolution have produced a sort of symbiotic relationship between humans and livestock. Cows realized this a long time ago: “Y’know, we stick with these guys Bessie it might not be the worst thing y’know what I mean? Sure we lose one every so often but at least….oh crap, look out here comes another bobcat, let’s get outta here…”
It really basically comes down to the human race being the Mafia of the food chain. It’s like, “Yeah okay all you cows and pigs and chickens, we got a business proposition to make you. Yeah yeah, we’ll offer you protection. But uh, we’re gonna need a little something in return for our services here. Y’know what I’m sayin’? Now, lemme introduce my business associates here who will be overseeing this arrangement henceforth: Louis “The Colonel” Sanders…Ronald “The Fryolater” McDonald…, and my little protégé here….Wendy.”
Okay, so here's a quiz about humorous quotations involving cows. I hope you enjoy it, and please rate it afterward if you have a chance.
Good Luck, and may you be mooooooved by the experience.
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